When legalism is just plain funny


In my Christian high school, which was run by Independent Missionary Baptists, I one day saw a textbook opened on a younger student’s desk.

The textbook had illustrations of two faces with different haircuts: the first haircut was close-cropped and shaped simply around the head; the second went wide at the top, the hair leaning out above the ears, making a wide wedge, giving the little guy in the drawing an owl-like look.

The first was labeled “Christian Haircut.”

The second was labeled “Worldly Haircut.”

I think we all know that, if we really read our Bibles and prayed, we would have to come to the conclusion that some haircuts are deeply offensive to God. He sits in his throne room and decrees certain haircuts too worldly to countenance, and will assign people with worldly haircuts to a place near sex-traffickers and warlords who give automatic weapons to boys.

As to whether someone can have a bad haircut without having a worldly haircut, I’ll leave that question to the philosophers and theologians.

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2 responses to “When legalism is just plain funny

  1. In light of this post on Christian and un-Christian hair cuts, I must ask the question. What kind of haircut did Jesus have in the 62 foot tall statue of himself? Perhaps that needs to be factored in before we leap to hasty conclusions.

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